Marriage Counseling Seattle & Therapy | Marriage Recovery Center (2023)

FAQs

What percentage of marriages survive after counseling? ›

The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists reports an overall success rate of 98%.

Licensed clinical social workers (LCSWs) or Licensed Professional Counselors (LPCS) are also typically not qualified to provide couples therapy. Only marriage and family therapists have specialized education, training and experience in helping couples.

Many couples therapies fail because the partners continue to experience each other as adversaries. Consequently, they remain locked in bitter struggles for dominance and persistently discredit each other's point of view and emotional reactions.

Couples therapy helps narcissism much better than individual therapy — because the partner is involved in the effort. When the therapist works with the two of you, there is a much better chance of success — because there is so much more leverage.

Even in an abusive relationship, a couples therapist will likely not suggest divorce. They will, however, help the victim find separation and seek help. Therapists will do everything they can to keep their clients safe.

It is a clinical decision that each therapist makes on his or her own. There is no hard and fast rule about it. However, seeing each person separately does not necessarily mean that your therapist will keep secrets.

Couples therapy is typically pursued when the couple is experiencing problems, big or small, in their relationship and wants to understand the “why.” Marriage counseling, on the other hand, is often attended by newlyweds and sometimes even required of couples before getting married.

The findings found that the Gottman marriage counseling improved marital relationships by helping couples “develop problem-solving skills. These skills make couples more flexible in their relationships and help them achieve a high degree of emotional stability and a peaceful life”.

What is the most common problem addressed in couples therapy? ›

' yes, it can be saved. Both of you have to start working towards repairing a marriage. Counseling helps, but therapies often fail to bring the desired result for most marriages. There are alternate ways to save a marriage without the help of a marriage counselor or therapist.

Narcissistic partners act as if they are always right, that they know better and that their partner is wrong or incompetent. This often leaves the other person in the relationship either angry and trying to defend themselves or identifying with this negative self-image and feeling badly about themselves.

A narcissistic husband is usually a very selfish person and will only think about themselves, and not about you or your relationship together. They might expect you to do all the housework, or they may want to have sex with you when they want it, but not when you want it.

Working through issues with a trusted third party is one of the best ways to fix a toxic relationship. Toxic relationships rarely start out as toxic, and bringing things back to a salvageable place is possible. Both partners will need to show up to marriage counseling, ready to work together.

While the specific number of sessions depends entirely on the couple and the approach of their therapist, on average, you can expect to spend anywhere from 12-30 hours, according to the therapists I spoke to.

You know it's time to get a divorce when your spouse is neither that partner, nor a friend. Disconnect within a marriage can lead to feelings of loneliness. This loneliness only decays the marriage bond faster. Stay too long, and you'll feel trapped – leading to a messier, more expensive divorce.

How often should married couples go to counseling? ›

It's up to you. Typically people go to marriage counseling either weekly or every other week. When we meet for the first time we'll help you answer the question, "How often should I go to marriage counseling?" Ultimately you should go to marriage counseling as often as you feel you need it.

Should a Therapist Advise Divorce? As a general rule, it is considered unethical for mental health professionals to give advice at all. Our job is to help you learn to make those decisions yourself, not to tell you how to make them.

Cons of Couples Therapy

Therapy is a long-term process, and requires a commitment from each individual for the relationship to work. It is a process that is better done sooner rather than later, so that the healing can happen before damage is too severe. Boundaries may become confusing.

Some people say marriage counseling “causes” divorce. This isn't typically true, but therapy can expose problems and issues that aren't easily resolved. If the couple refuses to or can't work through their issues, then they may blame the counselor for causing a separation or divorce.

The Four Horsemen are four communication habits that increase the likelihood of divorce, according to research by psychologist and renowned marriage researcher John Gottman, Ph. D. Those four behaviors are criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt.

The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling. Being able to identify the Four Horsemen in your conflict discussions is a necessary first step to eliminating them and replacing them with healthy, productive communication patterns.

According to relationship researcher John Gottman, the magic ratio is 5 to 1. What does this mean? This means that for every one negative feeling or interaction between partners, there must be five positive feelings or interactions. Stable and happy couples share more positive feelings and actions than negative ones.

While there are countless divorce studies with conflicting statistics, the data points to two periods during a marriage when divorces are most common: years 1 – 2 and years 5 – 8. Of those two high-risk periods, there are two years in particular that stand out as the most common years for divorce — years 7 and 8.

What is a toxic marriage like? ›

A toxic marriage is a chronic condition characterized by ongoing unhealthy mental, physical, and emotional issues that are unresolved and fester into even bigger problems. Physical abuse, substance abuse, adultery, desertion, or other major transgressions are obvious signs that a marriage is in trouble.

According to some research, approximately a quarter of couples who receive marriage therapy report that their relationship is worse two years after ending therapy, and up to 38 percent of couples who receive marriage therapy get divorced within four years of completing therapy.

They may worry about being judged or ganged up on by the marriage counselor. They may have had unhelpful experiences with past therapy, often counseling that was not evidence-based, or that was conducted by a “couples counselor” with little training in couples counseling — which is unfortunately common.

The short answer is that yes, a sexless marriage can survive – but it can come at a cost. If one partner desires sex but the other is uninterested, lack of sex can lead to decreased intimacy and connection, feelings of resentment and even infidelity.

According to some research, approximately 38% of couples who have undergone marriage counseling get divorced within four years after completing the therapy sessions.

McCoy and Aamodt listed the occupation therapists, all other as having a divorce/separation rate of 24.20%, sociologists as 23.53%, social workers as 23.16%, counselors as 22.49%, miscellaneous social scientists and workers as 19.65%, and psychologists as 19.30%.

What percentage of therapy ends in divorce? ›

According to some research, approximately a quarter of couples who receive marriage therapy report that their relationship is worse two years after ending therapy, and up to 38 percent of couples who receive marriage therapy get divorced within four years of completing therapy.

About 75 percent of people who enter psychotherapy show some benefit from it. Psychotherapy has been shown to improve emotions and behaviors and to be linked with positive changes in the brain and body.

Married couples between the ages of 20 to 25 are 60% likely to get a divorce. Black women divorce at a higher rate (38.9%) than women of any other race. The military divorce rate is 3% on average. In 2019 alone, 30,608 military marriages ended in divorce.

The study found that on average unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married when rated on any of 12 separate measures of psychological well-being. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self-esteem, or increase a sense of mastery.

Marriage counseling typically lasts six months or less, and some mental health professionals say that the longer counseling goes on, the less effective it is.